Filling up at the Quick Tip: Crummies

I have a tip for y'all right quick.

You folks remember all those extra pieces of bread I've been saving up lately? 

From my half a peanut butter toast? The crust off the eggplant sandwich? Bread heels?

Uhh....

Well, I accumulate a lot of extra bits of bread. 

It's tough to use a whole loaf as a single person in the time granted by the expiration date.

My habit of eating half slices of bread for things doesn't exactly help.

What's a body to do with all that extra bread???

Berenjena el Almuerzo

Having a nice week, y'all?

I certainly am.
I went s a l s a  d a n c i n g last night. 
It was Cuban style.

"Woohoo!" I thought to myself.

"This will be fun. Easy!"

"Why, it' s only fancy walking!"

Not quite.

I was terrible. More terrible than anyone else there.

More terrible than my stiff, birdlike roommate Paul.

A girl actually asked him to dance with her!

Just when I thought I was finally getting the hang of it, the instructor would stare meaningfully at me and cheerily remind "everyone" that no one was perfect!

It just took time!

You're supposed to be turning right!

Other right!

Folks, I can't dance.
But I can make sandwiches!

I enjoyed this satiating eggplant sandwich to replenish all the energy I lost fumbling around the dance floor.

I also enjoyed an extra whiskey after exhausting my drink ticket.

I Can Hear the Mermaids Singing, Peach to Peach

Sleep alright, y'all?

I was not treated to a peaceful repose last night myself.

This is not why.

No. 

Convincing people into my rock hard, way-too-small 20 year old half of a bunk bed does not happen with alarming frequency. Obviously my bed is the only thing standing between me and a sex life.

Bunk beds may seem awesome, folks. 

(You can build hotwheel tracks off the top! Or drape blankets for a fort!)

But there is  an unavoidable reality  when it  comes to adults sleeping in bunk beds.

& it is stark.

Awesome bunk beds: a great way to appear as if you want to lure children into your home!

I needed something refreshing after a night in my horrible infirm (pun intended--old&hard???) half a bunk bed.

I needed a peach smoothie to brighten up my day.

And some peanut butter toast.

I love how the peach skin looks in the smoothie.

Silky Pasta

Bonjourno, y'all!

I've never had a taste for Italian food. Whenever its served, my countenance sours.
Oh. You got lasagna? Perhaps I could eat some old leftovers from your fridge? 
What did you have yesterday? Meatloaf?


Isn't Italian food just a delivery system for butter & cheese? 
...
What?

"No!", you say? "What about the vino", you wonder? "Polenta is basically grits", you'd remind me? "Surely you eat arrosticini fairly regularly?" you'd marvel?

Well, Grand Inquisitor, riddle me this.
It'd stump even Bilbo Baggins himself, I wager.

How do you explain the Olive Garden???

Oh, you can't? That's what I thought.

Folks, I know Olive Garden is not the only eatery proffering Italian-American fare. 
I am aware of the possibility that Olive Garden is not authentic Italian food.

I don't care. (I still don't want to eat Italian-style food okay.)

But there is one thing that really gets me jazzed about eating (anything) & that one thing is FREEBIES.

Man oh man do I like free shit.

One of the many personality traits I share with Oprah.

So when one of my brother's friends was moving out of his apartment, and inexplicably throwing his pantry out, I scored some egg noodles.

They had an Italian flag printed right on the box. "Made in Italy," they taunted me. 
Those noodles sat in my pantry forever. Well past the recommended use by date. 

Finally I used some of them last night.
I'll be dratted if I didn't enjoy those egg noodles down to the last bite.

I even ate an extra noodle I found while cleaning out my colander later that evening.