I Need a Gauze Patch, Yo!

Hey, y'all!

I finally got back to work this month. (Hooray!)

My job requires no mental aptitude. Not one lick!

Can you guess what it is???

The job title is a real panty dropper at clubs.

Driving in circles for hours each day gives me a lot of time for thoughts.

I think about food, or anecdotes.

Sometimes I even think about important thoughts! 

Like how to end class warfare and which movies have the most Ellen Page.

But most of the time I f a n t a s i z e about kicking ass.

I foil terrorist plots waged against the transit system.

Snatch damsels in distress from the jaws of certain death. Mansels too!

.......

I might have a teeny tiny little hero complex.

You can't tell , though. I'm very timid in person.

The most dangerous thing I did all week was cut vegetables.

She's sustained a serious finger boo-boo, doc.

For my made-from scratch gazpacho soup. It was spicy & chilled & perfect.

Served for lunch with a chicken salad sandwich on a toasted onion bun.

Garnished with chopped green onions.