I Need a Gauze Patch, Yo!

Hey, y'all!

I finally got back to work this month. (Hooray!)

My job requires no mental aptitude. Not one lick!

Can you guess what it is???

The job title is a real panty dropper at clubs.

Driving in circles for hours each day gives me a lot of time for thoughts.

I think about food, or anecdotes.

Sometimes I even think about important thoughts! 

Like how to end class warfare and which movies have the most Ellen Page.

But most of the time I f a n t a s i z e about kicking ass.

I foil terrorist plots waged against the transit system.

Snatch damsels in distress from the jaws of certain death. Mansels too!

.......

I might have a teeny tiny little hero complex.

You can't tell , though. I'm very timid in person.

The most dangerous thing I did all week was cut vegetables.

She's sustained a serious finger boo-boo, doc.

For my made-from scratch gazpacho soup. It was spicy & chilled & perfect.

Served for lunch with a chicken salad sandwich on a toasted onion bun.

Garnished with chopped green onions.

I used Alton Brown's recipe for the  gazpacho , and made aaaaalmost no changes..

(The only thing I changed was, I left out the extra tomato juice he says to add because I forgot to buy it. Also I didn't take out the tomato seeds or any of that dumb fruity bullshit like that.)

Basically, just make the dang soup.
It came out to 6 servings. 
You'll like it. And eat it with a  chicken salad sandwich , cause it's still hot and I know you're not trying to cook anything, girl.

Chicken salad , featuring no disgusting mayonnaise!

Ingredients:::

• 13oz canned white chicken (1 can)
• 4 oz canned albacore tuna (1 can, and an optional ingredient.. reduce the yogurt accordingly if you omit it)
• 154g red grapes, sliced in half (approx. 1 + 1/4 cup of grapes)
• 1/4 cup chopped walnuts
• 13 g diced red onion (approx. 1/4 medium onion)
• 1 stalk celery
• 3 tbsp reduced fat sour cream
• 170g plain, nonfat greek yogurt (3/4 cup)
• 1 tsp light brown sugar
• 2-5 sprigs of fresh dill (adjust depending on how much you like dillweed)

So easy a bus driver can do it!
This is yet another recipe that requires no further instructions, 

but I'll steer you in the right direction anyway:

Chop everything into appropriate sizes, and stir until it looks like a uniform heterogeneous mixture.

Chicken salad recipe makes 6 servings.

Nutrition Information

Ingredient	Calories	Fat	Carbs	Protein
Chicken Salad	159	6	9	17
Onion bun	170	3	31	6
Gazpacho soup	117	9	7	1
Total	446	18	47	24

*Spinach on sandwich not listed.